Ten Complaints I had as a Child

Do you want her tears?

We have all been children. I don’t know about you, but I had many complaints to the world around me as a child.  If you are/have a child, then just read on..

As a child, I had these complaints, but never told an adult. Now that I’m a teenager, I realise it and think why I never did. If I had done so, my childhood have been much much better.

Your children also may have similar or same complaints. They either don’t tell you, or you don’t mind when they tell. Consider them,  and your child’s childhood will be much better than the one they live. Otherwise, well, by the time THEY realise it, their childhood would be gone. So here are my complaints:

DISCLAIMER: * I have used ‘she’ because 1. I am a girl 2. Well, Women first * These are ordered from least to most frustrating *

10. Me too exists. Not only my cousins do. 

It’s my friends complaint, not mine. She was sad on Xmas day & told me she didn’t get a new dress for Xmas. Her parents were in US and CAN afford one. I asked this, she said: ‘When mom and dad came from US for vacation, they bought dress for all kids, but counted wrong and bought one less. There WAS a dress meant for me, but I had to give it up for my cousin so that she won’t feel left out.’ I ask you, won’t MY FRIEND feel left out? She lives in India and haven’t seen US. Won’t SHE want a foreign gift? When you buy something for kids, if you don’t have enough, go to a local shop, buy a new one, mix it with others and distribute them without even mentioning. At least your kid”s heart won’t be broken.

9. Aren’t me and she alike?

This is for adults other than parents.  I don’t really think a parent REALLY differentiates between his/her OWN kids. Think, you meet some kids. Some of them will be pranksters, irritating, horrible. But some will be calm and adorable. We usually like the good ones, not the rest. But PLEASE never show this. I was quite okay as a child, so I never faced it, but have seen many instants after I’ve grown up. Adults mollycoddle and speak only with some kids. I’ve even seen adults who give chocolates to one or two kids in a group. Don’t they feel ashamed?

8.You gave my doll to her?? MY DOLL?

Garage sales exist in West, but in India, we usually donate old things to poor children. I’ll never disagree. Helping poor is a great thing. But can’t we make a change? Buy good new things for poor children if you respect charity. Not your kid’s old things. One, giving old and useless things to poor children is equal to insulting them. Two,whatever you give away, for you, it may be an old rag. For your kid, it may be a piece of her heart. Once my brand new bicycle was given to a kid. (Only 3 months since we bought, I haven’t even LEARNED to ride it). And the SPOILER? I wasn’t even asked before it was taken from me. I knew about it only after it happened. Bad Habit. Really bad habit.

7. You never does that with me..

This too is for parents. Usually parents (esp. Indians) think showing love to kids is cheesy. In fact it IS, don’t do it if you don’t like. But if you don’t mollycoddle your kids, please don’t do these stuff with OTHER kids as well. You will go to a friends’ house, give a packet of chocolates to their kid, take her in your lap and say, you are such a cutie pie. Anyone saw a big no-no anywhere? Don’t worry. You will see it in the stuck up face of your kid when you get home.

6. So you have no time. Shall I go away?

I never faced this. In my childhood, most Indian moms were housewives and had time for us. But not now. Your kid will come to tell something and you say: “Oh-oh don’t come and pester me. I’ve house work, office jobs, extra tasks.. Go away.” You may not be looking at your child’s face then (forgot? you have so much works!). But if you do, you’ll see a look that’ll leave you unfit to work any more.

5. Why am I always blamed?

In fact, half the problems in the house ARE caused by kids. But don’t blame them ALWAYS. Because, though half of the problems are caused by kids, not ALL of them are. You blame your kid for shattered hair in floor saying she never puts fallen hair in trash after brushing. But at least SOME of them may be yours. You scold your kid for not putting laundry in washing machine. But one day you tell her to put it in the unused chair, next day, in the bucket in bathroom, next day, in the washing machine, other day, under the pillow (that was my imagination ) and not only your kid,  even YOU get confused. You can scold and blame the child for her wrongs, but only if it is completely her fault.

4. Why say “You got WHAT? Great deal.”?

It means this. NEVER disappoint your child. ‘Look, I got Second in State for drawing.’   ‘You got only second? Great deal.’   The last thing to say to your child when she comes with an achievement. Inquiry goes on: ‘So which grade?’   ‘B. No one got A.’   ‘Pathetic. How much grace marks?’   ’30.’  There’s another thing that you can add to make the day for your child: ‘Heard about Billu? He got First Prize  for Essay. A grade. 60 grace marks.’  Can you blame your child if she wished the next year’s essay topic for first grade kids shall be “the statistical aspects of production possibility in a developing country”? Sigh.

3. I’m the one saying truth, but you support HER?

This one is SPECIALLY for parents. Imagine your child quarrels with your neighbours one, you KNOW the truth is in your child’s part but STILL why don’t you  support her? And WORSE, why do you SUPPORT the other? Ask this to the parents and you’ll get this answer: ‘How  to support our kids in front of the other’s parents? What will they think? It’s cheap..’ Arre yaar, how can it be cheap if you KNOW that your kid is true? Well, don’t support if you don’t want, but can’t you just stay IMPARTIAL? What is the need of supporting her rival? Your kid’ll be thinking “Whatever be my problems, my parents will NEVER stay with me.” Give that look if you must.

2. Yeah, she’s smaller, but aren’t I small too?

Think two kids quarrel over something, and the adult (the famous ‘mediator’) says ‘Rinky, give it to Pinky.. She’s smaller than you, no?’ Arre Yaar, what if Pinky is four and Rinky is five? Still this holds.. No one cares if the older one is YET a kid.. Only the YOUNGER one belongs to ‘kid’ category and the elder child, well, she is supposed to behave as the ‘responsible’, sacrificing everything for dear kiddie. I tell you, this ISN’T a case of siblings. I am a single child and have had ENOUGH of this.. I really hope, despite the quarrels, Rinky and Pinky really love each other. Otherwise, their beautiful childhood will be beautiful enough to be chucked in the dustbin.

1. Why do you compare me with her?

I hate this one. I HATE this one. Be it with your child’s siblings, cousins, friends, or classmates, comparing never does good to a child. You may be doing it to egg kids on, so that they may study with competition and bring better results. But it  ruins her. She WILL turn hostile to the one she had been compared with. Kids start hating each other. These hatreds does not go off even in adulthood. Simply put, you so easily takes away innocent friendships from your child.

All the moms and dads, keep this in mind. Your kid will be a better human being when she grows up. Happy Parenting.

Don't compare, let them be friends, not rivals...

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